There is an index to the IOM censuses on Lawson's Micro-Site at www.iomfhs.im/research.html which includes ages. You can see who is in the same household by same ref. numbers.

The LDS 1881 England & Wales (& IOM) census transcript is free as one of the options on FamilySearch.org.

You can look up households by choosing the advanced search for 1901 and 1911.
www.1901censusonline.com/
www.1911census.co.uk/ [use full person search].

Sue